I Miss You

 Connected

A word that can be counterfeited

A counterfeit of the phone, the television show, the movie. 

A counterfeit of gossip where we feel connected when we join others in bringing words of brokenness rather than life. 

A counterfeit of being in a group, but not feeling like I belong. 

A person to call

A person to text

A person's page to look through

All while with me in the presence of you

I try desperately to get one's attention to see them buried in that same counterfeit connection

I remember the days we entered each other's worlds

Rather than the virtual world

We have a counterfeit connection now

And I miss you

I miss you not because you aren't physically here

You are physically here

I miss you because although we are in the same room, I can't get connected no matter how hard I try. 

I fear rejection constantly. 

I fear that we are losing time together. 

Maybe I miss God too, not because he won't connect with me; rather, I struggle to connect with him. 

I mean I do the same thing, try to get that connection that is only so counterfeited. 

Connection that will never satisfy my heart.

Will that person message me back?

Will these reels get through to me? 

Man, I got to put that phone down. 

My heart misses God when I won't turn to him. 

I miss God, my Heavenly Father. 

I miss God as he knows my whole soul, every wrestling, tension, tear and joy. 

I miss God who loves me deeply.

I miss God who has grace for me when I am just so quick to put myself down. 

I miss God who loves me in my strongholds. 

In this season, I miss God as I feel so alone in a new world where it is hard to connect. 

God may we connect with you this week. God may we connect with each other more than the virtual, more in life than in brokenness, more in love and truth. 

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